The First Few Days

Graham is six days old now, and I'm relieved to be able to tell you that, for the most part, I've been able to keep my wits about me. I think it was all the mental self-talk beforehand where I told myself, "Chill. Just chill." With Gavin, my life was so turned upside-down, and I was just beside myself. I also need to remember that things shook down a little differently in the beginning with Gavin. He was four or five days old when we brought him home because we spent so much time in the hospital. I hadn't been outside, or even had a glimpse of the sky through my window, during my hospital stay. I could hardly walk. It wasn't a great experience to get me off on the right foot.

Although the Graham's delivery was no easy feat, it was definitely a more positive experience. I've been told that that makes a huge difference with feeling overwhelmed. You are better equipped to just dig motherhood a little bit better. I think it's due more to the fact that this isn't my first rodeo...but I'll take it any way.

The hardest thing is the cluster feeding. Well, maybe the no sleep thing, too. They're neck and neck. This morning, G2 and I were up at 7, and he didn't take a nap until about 1pm. He spent the whole time nursing. Every time I thought he was asleep and I could have my hands free, he'd start crying again. I had even gotten in the shower at one point, and then he started crying. In that case, he just had to spend a few minutes upset while I finished up and got dressed. With Gavin, that would have shot my anxiety through the roof. This time, it was like, "Eh this kinda thing is gonna happen. Whatever." So, I either sat on the couch, or I was up and about and did everything I needed to do with just one hand for five or six hours. Not an ideal situation, but with Dylan at home to help with Gavin, it was A-OK.

Dylan has been on the go-go-go since the baby was born. All for good reasons. God has really smiled down on our family this week. But, it was really nice to have all of us at home today. I just finished a couple of to-dos, D & G are at Safeway, and G2 is still taking his first nap of the day. And hence, you can find me blogging. I did squeeze in a nap as soon as G2 fell asleep. I've been getting about five hours of sleep in 1 or 2 hour increments each night. I don't feel awesome, but I'm just going with the flow. G2 will nurse for 2 or 3 hours at a time in the middle of the night. It sucks. And since he eats so much, his output is extraordinary, meaning I changed five diapers between 10pm and 7am. So, if you find yourself with insomnia, text me. We will talk!

We've actually gotten out a time or two since bringing home the baby. I'm not much for being a homebody. I understand that my body has to heal and that I need to take it easy in order to establish this breastfeeding relationship. (I failed miserably with Gavin, which set me up for months of agony. I was determined to be patient and give it my best shot this time.) So, I'm not about to go out on a jog or anything. However, I'm not afraid to walk around in public with a nursing cover around my neck, so I've done that exact thing a few times. We took Gavin to Kierland on Saturday night, and it was just perfect. We timed it so that we heard a few Christmas carols, listened to Mrs. Claus tell her final story of the Christmas season, roasted s'mores, saw the "snow" and let Gavin run around the grass for a little while. Both boys were a disaster by the time we left for home, but it was more than worth it.

He says, "I'm Gavin the baby!"

LOVE these boys

My first afternoon alone, 2-on-1 with both boys. We went out to feed the horse. I may or may not have had to carry Gavin kicking and screaming back inside while wearing the baby. My workout for the day.

Listening to Mrs Claus

S'mores

Our double set-up

Then, my parents took the whole family to Butterfly Wonderland on Sunday morning. Dylan had to fly, but he was able to get Gavin out of bed and set him up with some cereal and a truck video. I was able to get a half shower and get both boys out of the house to meet my family in the morning, and I'm so glad I pulled it together. It was a fun little outing. Definitely better than trying to keep G entertained at home while simultaneously having a baby plugged into my body the whole time. All the boys loved it, and we even did a Peter Piper stop on the way home. Maybe I'm crazy for taking a newborn out in public, but he was nursing the whole time undercover, so I think we should be okay.

Butterfly Wonderland. Here I am looking about as fantastic as you'd expect a person to look after doing the most physically exhausting thing of their life and then not really sleeping for four days. This picture makes me want to tell myself to take a nap.

Pierce and Gavin driving the car at Peter Piper.

Watching the butterfly movie in 3D with Nonna.

He LOVED the butterflies.

He also LOVES Uncle Max.

And LOVES his cousins. A great day for G!

G went home with Nonna and Papa to play after Peter Piper so I could get a break for the afternoon.

Victory!

At the park in Nonna and Papa's neighborhood.

Driving Daddy's RC car.

The week ahead will prove to be busy as well. I'm so excited for Christmas this year! It's the first year that I think we will really see Gavin get excited and really enjoy it. He's been talking about Santa and Rudolph and asking to see Christmas lights. It's been so fun. Here's to hoping I can maintain a certain level of baseline energy and my good spirits! Thanks for all your warm texts and messages about the baby. I can't wait for him to meet everybody once things settle down!