It's been quite a year with the newest Miller. It ended quite differently than it began. We didn't have the easiest start with our little guy, but it wasn't so bad. I was hell bent on succeeding at breastfeeding, and I'm no dairy factory, so it was kind of tough. My determination, and probably my post-partum hormones, kept me mostly homebound for his first few months. (Looking back, I don't know how I didn't go stir crazy...but I was a different version of myself back then.) We escaped to Mom Groups, and I was in 100% Mommy Mode back then.
Graham wasn't too happy in his early months. He cried pretty often, and he didn't sleep too much. We had a good 8-week stretch where he woke up every 1-2 hours at night. I don't know how I kept at it because now that we've come so far, that seems downright awful. His green poo and fussiness made me go off dairy for a few months, which is a staple in my diet. Why did I do this to myself...especially during a time when I was ravenously hungry 24/7?
By the time we got home from summer vacation, I was over it. It was time to turn over a new leaf. We got out of the house and got on with our lives. We introduced the bottle...and the formula...and guess what? Everyone survived! We did better than survive. Graham got much fatter (for better or for worse...but probably for better), and I got less fat. (Definitely for the better.) I felt like me again, and we got to see Graham's little personality emerge, which has been SO fun!
Now that we've made it to his first birthday, the memories of those really hard early months have almost faded completely. I just see a chunky, smiley guy who brightens everyone's mood. And makes me crazy by getting into EVERYTHING. He still isn't perfect at sleeping...but it's not too bad. He usually goes down without too much fussing, and he actually naps when it's time for a nap. I think he's a normal sleeper, and I'm so grateful for that, because my first go at this was anything but normal and nearly sent me over the edge.
Graham has been the perfect addition to round out our family. His presence has balanced everything, and he is absolutely adorable. He is laid back, happy and loves people. He will be our troublemaker, for sure. He's constantly on the move, always curious, and he has the most genuine, heart-warming smile I've ever seen. His big personality has won him the award for the most nicknames ever...Grahamby, Grahambus, Bus, Boss, Bus-Busterman, Buster, Beasterman. You get the idea. The best is hearing Gavin rotate between the nicknames like it's a totally normal thing. Or calling him "The Thick One." Or asking, "Are you a beast, or are you a man?"
I've always been honest about the fact that I'm not cut-out for parenting small children, but every second and every ounce of effort has been more than worth it. The past year with a baby and a toddler might go down in history as one of the toughest for me, but I won't say it was bad. (Well, at times it was bad. But every year will have bad times...)
What I'm most excited about is what's in store for our fun-loving, people-loving, adventure-loving little smile guy. I think he'll keep me on my toes for his toddlerhood, but I know for certain he'll bring unimaginable joy. Watching my boys grow up together will be the best thing I've done in my life. I love you, Graham! In fact, everyone who knows you loves you too! Happy, happy birthday
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