I wanted to report to everyone that I'm a huge flake. A tiny part of me is considering not moving. Part of the reason I've been so public about my mission to move closer into town was to held accountable in keeping steadfast in my decision. However, I'm getting pressure from every angle to not move. Nobody really wants this, except for me, and my history shows that I'm prone to caving under pressure. It looks like this might not be different than any other situation.
We've worked our asses off to sock away a stash so that we can afford to get the heck out of here...but what if we used that money to fix this house up real nice? Like, all those ideas I see on HGTV and my Instagram feed (which consists of 94% designers and 6% friends), I could actually execute in a perfectly good home where we already live? Well, not perfectly good. The location, for now, straight up sucks. I find myself getting especially cranky about the driving and the feeling of being stranded in the middle of BFE after I've been on my own with the kids for a day or two. I mean, I shouldn't have to be gone from my house for 11 hours to work an 8 hour shift, when all I'm doing is dropping off my kids, going to work, picking up my kids, and going home. That is plain stupid.
But when I'm not alone, it's not quite as big a deal. I'm okay with running every car we ever own into the ground. The cost of gas doesn't get me too down when I consider the other ways in which we save. (Bummer about the carbon footprint we leave, though.) And I've learned a lot by listening to podcasts in those few rare moments that Gavin isn't talking nonstop during our drive. I always thought that it would never work for me to have a job in Scottsdale while my kids are at school in Cave Creek. But now I'm starting to think that the older they get, that it just might work out to stick around here. Maybe.
Before I was like 95% sold on the idea of moving, and now I'm at like 85%. So I'm not telling you that I've changed my mind. I'm just considering the possibilities and trying to be a little forward thinking. And when it comes to renovating this house, the possibilities are endless because it definitely needs a facelift. If we move, chances are good we'll be in a fixer upper that we can't afford to fix up, and that would make me pretty sad. On the other hand, if I blow everything we have on renovating this house and take the possibility of moving off the table, will I live to regret it? It's hard to know, but it's a gamble either way.
We are messy people, and our house is very busy. When Dylan's out of town and people want to show the house, that will suck. It will suck no matter who is or isn't in town, actually. Packing and moving will suck, and it will suck a 100 times more if we have to do it twice, since we can't buy a new house until we sell the old one. So much about moving will suck, but it could all be completely worth it.
I'm sure you've heard that the housing market is starting to boom everywhere. Everywhere, that is, except for right here in the Rio Verde Foothills, where the inventory is high and the average price per square foot is unfortunately low. So, maybe this change of heart is just a defense mechanism since it's possible we'll have no way out of here, even if we try? I don't know...last week I could be found saying, "I don't care if we end up in a 2-bedroom shack, I'm not living here anymore." Or, "I have a life to live, and it's not meant to be lived in this stupid car!" This week, it's totally different. My brain doesn't even know how to process anything anymore. For now, the interior is getting a fresh coat of paint in a week, which will be a monstrous endeavor and a long overdue upgrade. Hopefully, it will brighten things up in here. When everything is back in place after that, I'll have to really consider whether to love it or list it.
#firstworldproblems
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